EAST WITTERING (n.)
The same
as west
wittering (q.v.), only it's you they're trying to get away from.
EDGBASTON (n.)
The spare
seat-cushion carried by a London bus, which is placed against the rear bumper
when the driver wishes to indicate that the bus has broken down. No one knows
how this charming old custom originated or how long it will continue.
ELY (n.)
The first, tiniest inkling you
get that something, somewhere, has gone terribly wrong.
EMSWORTH (n.)
Measure of time and
noiselessness defined as the moment between the doors of a lift closing and it
beginning to move.
EPPING (participial vb.)
The futile
movements of forefingers and eyebrows used when failing to attract the attention
of waiters and barmen.
EPSOM (n.)
An entry in a diary (such as
a date or a set of initials) or a name and address in your address book, which
you haven't the faintest idea what it's doing there.
EPWORTH (n.)
The precise value of the
usefulness of epping (q.v.).
It is a little-known fact that an earlier draft of the final line of the film
Gone with the Wind had Clark Gable saying, 'Frankly my dear, I don't give
an epworth', the line being eventually changed on the grounds that it might not
be understood in Cleveland.
ERIBOLL (n.)
A brown bubble of cheese
containing gaseous matter which grows on welsh rarebit. It was Sir Alexander
Fleming's study of eribolls which led, indirectly, to his discovery of the fact
that he didn't like welsh rarebit very much.
ESHER (n.)
One of those push taps
installed in public washrooms enabling the user to wash their trousers without
actually getting into the basin. The most powerful esher of recent years was
'damped down' by Red Adair after an incredible sixty-eight days' fight in
Manchester's Piccadilly Station.
EVERCREECH (n.)
The look given by
a group of polite, angry people to a rude, calm queue-barger.
EWELME (n., vb.)
The smile bestowed on
you by an air hostess.
EXETER (n.)
All light household and
electrical goods contain a number of vital components plus at least one
exeter.
If you've just mended a fuse, changed a bulb or fixed a blender, the
exeter is the small, flat or round plastic or bakelite piece left over which
means you have to undo everything and start all over again.